The Art of Destruction
Metamorphosis is naturally destructive......This was a Danielle LaPorte truthbomb that kept jumping out of the deck I bought after seeing her speak in Sydney. Its all so timely as right now I'm breaking free of some old belief systems myself. I'm loving the word destructive, its like its taken on a whole new meaning for me in a positive way. While Destructive can be messy, ugly, life altering and so complicated, exhausting even, at the same time its liberating, restorative, and it brings clarity and freedom. I guess it really comes down to perspective, when I look at this word I see the beauty in the difficult emotional work we have to do to get to the other side. Reminds me of one of my old favourite sayings....'even when its bad its good'.
When I read Danielle's truthbomb my first actual thought was the transistion of the caterpillar into the butterfly and the breaking free of the cocoon, an act of destruction. We are constantly growing and changing, its necessary for us to gain our metaphoric wings. As I'm writing this I think back to a time in my 20's when I was a builders labourer, my favourite part of the job was the demolition, ahh the destruction was therapeutic, bashing down walls, jack hammering, breaking things and then cleaning and clearing to leave a clear slate, a blank canvas if you will for the new. I was going through some relationship and self worth issues but I was a bit young to make the connection of what that physical job was doing for me at the time on a deeper level. I definitely see it now upon reflection, it was a place to channel the very destructive emotions, allowing me to get on with things.
Now as an Energy Healer, Belief systems and the stories we tell ourselves are at the forefront of my conversations with clients, its pretty cool to witness the light bulb moments they have when certain beliefs unfold and are reflected upon, awareness is the first step to change.
I'm constantly working on and questioning my own beliefs systems when they arise so I am definitely one to walk my talk and recently I have had some interesting ones reflected back at me. Let me share some.......feeling like a failure, uneducated, not good enough, very much a self deflating victim mentality really. I have been overly judgemental, an annoying perfectionist, and held very high expectations which have led to big let downs. I have walked on egg shells so as not to upset people, been ruled by obligation and guilt, and worried about what people think. Worst of all I have sucked at communicating my true feelings at times and found myself going along with others rather then having any kind of confrontation all because of my lack of confidence in articulation.
Anything resonating amongst that for you? Its tough right? From the work that I've done, I see these having been handed down from my generations passed and present. Just like we are handed down looks and personality traits through our DNA, emotional stuff is also handed down and then there is what is role modelled and taught to us. But its not about playing the blame game this is about taking responsibility for instigating change in my own life, changing the beliefs that do not serve me which is so very liberating.
You may be thinking - How the hell do we do that?
First step is definitely recognition and awareness, its the key to unlock the process.
Then comes time, time can be a bitch because its seems to be something we are all lacking in today's society but its crucial. If we want to make some changes MAKE the time and create the space to reflect, acknowledge and ponder on the emotions it brings up.
Having self compassion through this process is important. No berating and being hard on ourselves. It can be a rollercoaster ride of emotions depending how deep it goes but once we have a handle on the story and where it came from and how it potentially influences our lives, we have arrived.
Now its time to think and feel into what aligns for us and how we would like to do things different and start putting those behaviours, responses and decisions into place.
Finally with our new found awareness and our beautiful story that resonates, we then set ourselves up to catch any habitual old behaviour that pops up and remind ourselves of what it is we want to recalibrate regarding the new story/belief system that aligns so much better with our soul. Anytime we do fall back into old habits remember it is an opportunity to learn and do better next time. This can take daily conscious very worthwhile and sometimes challenging work.
It is important to ask for help. We cannot do this alone, if this is something you find really tough then start on what ever that belief system is that's creating the difficulty of reaching out for support. Maybe you tried and have been let down or you would like to but you think it makes you look weak. I wouldn't have got through my latest process without my helping hands, my guides, my Yoga Teacher, my Naturopath, my dear friends and a very synchronised trip to Sydney where Danielle LaPorte spoke to my soul and I'm so very grateful. I'm grateful for the opportunities that my ingrained belief systems have given me to grow and evolve.
Much love xo