Balance!

Searching for Balance can feel like searching for the Holy Grail.

Are we spending way to much time and energy trying to constantly find balance in our lives that we are missing the point?

Do we even know how to recognise it or even what to do with it when we are in the moment?

Is it supposed to look like what we see on social media?

When I personally think of Balance, the first image I see in my head is that of a set of old fashioned scales. You know the ones where you use weights to balance them out.

With the belief that those scales should be always balanced in life, it can lead to an incessant nagging of feeling like you are some kind of failure along with:
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• not being good enough
• deserving enough
• smart enough

Its really about how we look at things, we get so caught up in our pre-conceived ideas about certain goals we would like to have in our lives. For instance we decide on what it would take to bring about some balance, set those goals and then stick to them and we should be good. BUT what happens when life takes a different turn and it takes us out of this new balancing routine and then bang we are in the mindset of failure as I mentioned above.

It can look something like this - 'I'm going to get up earlier in the morning do some yoga and a bit of meditation', things are going well then maybe one of the kids wake up earlier, feeling sick or with a wet bed by the time you deal with that there is no time for your new routine. Maybe you wake up feeling unwell or you slept in and are now running late so you have to ditch the new routine and get out the door. The problem that usually happens is once out of this new routine, its hard to get the motivation to come back into it because we are caught up in the 'I failed', 'I can't stick at it', 'its to hard to do every morning'.

So how do we stop this unnecessary rollercoaster?

• STOP berating yourself.
• STOP making excuses.
• STOP putting so much pressure on yourself.

• START small - aim for just one morning a week - just get up and sit on the yoga mat or sit in the chair and put the guided meditation on or sit at the table with the journal.
• START with just one goal not three or four - once that settles and becomes more like a good habit add in something else.
• GET connected with Self Care and what it means - this will make it much easier to do things for yourself.
• GET a partner - accountability is a great motivating factor, make a pact with a friend to walk together, go to a class together, call each other to motivate getting on with your goal.

BALANCE is really about RECOGNISING when life is out of balance (red flags) and having a tool kit and the knowledge of what to do in those moments to bring it back. Its knowing when our beautiful old fashioned set of scales needs the weights adjusted, you may need to add a nap, a day in the kitchen to cook for the freezer so you have back up, a massage or that much needed meditation. When we are doing things to fill our reservoir of energy, we are able to keep pushing through things when life gets in the way, but its knowing when to act before we are burnt out or sick .

This is usually when we need our UNIVERSAL PERMISSION SLIP so if you are struggling say or better still write this down "I give myself permission to.................." fill in the blanks. Some suggestions would sound like this:

• Love yourself
• Make time for yourself
• Say no and set better boundaries

Easier said then done you maybe saying BUT setting the intention is a great start. If you feel like its just too hard and you really don't know how to start, then reach out. Having someone to support and teach us the tools to use or even to help unravel why the hell it is so hard can be very rewarding.

Connecting with Self Care can do just that, because when we connect with the act of loving, honouring, accepting, forgiving and caring for ourselves balance is ours.

Much love xo